Trust in the Lord with all your heart,

And do not lean into your own understanding.

In all your ways acknowledge Him,

And He will make your paths straight.

Do not be wise in your own eyes,

Fear the Lord and turn away from evil.

Proverbs 3:5-7 (New American Standard Bible)


 

When Change Disrupts Our Lives

I have always been afraid of the dark. Some people talk about the joy of getting out of the city and looking at the stars. When the sun goes down and the sunlit day disappears, I want to see street lights and plenty of them. One way I combatted my fear of something possibly happening during the night was to live in multiple-family dwellings where walls were connected and people would hear me if I screamed.

            In 2017 God led me to a different place to live—a freestanding patio home built for privacy. No longer was there the security that should there be a problem, I could trust others to come to my rescue. But that was okay because moving with me was my trusty alarm system, a cocker spaniel named Toby. He regularly reminded me of people walking past the house and the volume of the barking grew if someone dared to walk up to the door.

            Soon after the quarantine started in 2020, Toby’s health began to decline. In the emergency room on the night of July 1st, it became apparent that the kindest thing to do was to put him down. I returned home about 1:00 a.m. and sat for a while to try and calm my mind. Later, as I got ready for bed a thought whispered, “You can get scared.” Angry at one more problem, I snapped, “There’s no time for that.” The refusal to be drawn into fearful thinking helped me to sleep.

            It didn’t take long to realize that in order to feel safer, I had to make some intentional changes because the circumstances in my life were different. That needed feeling of security Toby granted me was no longer available. Exacerbating my fears was after taking my hearing aids out at night, I was at a disadvantage should there be a problem. What should I do?

            Several modifications seemed prudent. The first was with my house. Though the windows have a mechanism that makes them difficult to open, some of my doors needed better locks. With Toby’s presence it had been easy to ignore this need, but the time had come to make those necessary changes.

Though God led me to as safe a community as could probably be found in Houston, I still had to take responsibility for my safety. With Toby’s presence, it was easy to justify not locking the door between my garage and house because the garage was locked. It also wasn’t unusual for me go several days before relocking my back gate after the yard man had been here. Those practices changed to gates and doors being locked at all times, even if I’m just going around the corner to the mail box.

Surprisingly, I realized my reading habits needed to be examined. Though I love a good murder mystery, this genre opens my mind to those dark and scary possibilities. With this realization, the type of stories that once offered entertainment had to be modified.

            Another source of help was drawn from the lives of others who also live here alone. On those nights when my mind tried to wander into that back hole, I found comfort remembering that I’m not the only one here who lives alone and that the others have been safe.

            And then ultimately, after taking precautions, and locking up every night, my last thought was, I have done all I can do, and now my faith is in God who called me here. Not only is He not surprised nor powerless because of the change in my life, He is able to take care of me.

            Nine and a half months later a new cocker, Bailey, came to live with me. It’s a nice feeling to hear him bark when someone is within proximity of the house, but it is also empowering to realize that I was able to conquer a life-long fear.

            Thought: Be it on the job, relationships, or any part of our life, change happens. I hate to admit that often I have railed against the problems expecting others to do something that would get my life back on that comfortable track. Toby’s death was a reminder that though we need each other, those positive solutions in our lives are often dependent on our willingness and ability to make prayerful, well thought-out intentional changes.

            Question: What are some modifications you could make to help resolve a problem plaguing your life?

 

“A wise man changes his mind, a fool never will.”

(Spanish Proverb)

           

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